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If there is anything that overcomes and sees us through death it is love, a love stron… We exist to multiply Christ-followers through partnering, equipping and encouraging the local church. What happened last Friday was a net gain for my Uncle Randy. Suzanne Hadley Gosselin is a freelance writer and editor. What makes the bonding between humans so strong? But isn’t it always? My siblings and I would be just beginning to stir in our tent, and we would hear Randy rustling around in the campsite, … “Those we love never truly leave us. My first memories of my Uncle Randy involve camping. © 2020 Baptist Convention of New England, Inc. | Privacy Policy, Baptist Convention of New England, Inc., 87 Lincoln Street, Northborough, MA, 01532, United States. November 3, 2015. by. We can all find something to be thankful for even in these strange times, especially with Thanksgiving coming next week. Humans are not pure spirits such as angels. Some find their grief is so raw it feels as though they have lost part of themselves. But no, Jesus calls Martha to faith when He has appeared to fail her – when she has every reason to doubt Him. But it was a loss for those who love him — people like his devoted wife, three children, six grandchildren, brothers, nieces and nephews, and so many friends. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account” (Philippians 1:21-24). At the same time, it is true that those who know Christ grieve differently. In fact, after becoming a believer as a young man, he was the first to tell my father about Christ. Suzanne Hadley Gosselin. A Reflection on Losing Someone You Love. Though I can rejoice for my uncle, who knew Jesus, it still messes up so much here. In the midst of our sorrow, we have reason for faith. Some things can never be made right again in this life. Paul wrote: For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. A future, certain resurrection does not eliminate all present grief. “Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints.” ~ Psalm 116:15. Loss of a Loved One. My first memories of my Uncle Randy involve camping. How knowing the Good Shepherd changes everything. You feel that keenly when you lose someone you love. My family recently suffered the loss of my mother-in-law, a wonderful woman of God who was taken from us rather suddenly by pancreatic cancer. Last week he passed away unexpectedly. He’s only two years older than my dad. Instead, in the face of her sorrow and disappointment and in the face of death itself, Martha is called to have faith in Jesus as the Life-Giver who brings the ultimate healing of resurrection. We are saddened and disappointed that our loved one was not healed, and yet Jesus holds out the hope of a future resurrection – a hope proved certain by the dramatic raising of Lazarus (vv. 87 Lincoln St., Northborough, MA 01532 (map)508-393-6013 • (fax) 508-393-6016Contact Us. But as I enjoyed the warmth and love of family, I would suddenly be reminded that one of us was missing. He never came home from work to the soup my aunt made for dinner. I hope you will listen closely to those words, cling to them, and let them sink deeply into your life and into your heart. I am struck by how this event seems specifically designed for Jesus to model how to grieve the loss of a loved one – especially a beloved believer. These moments served as a cruel reminder that I have no control over how long my loved ones will be with me, that I can’t even assume they will be there for what I deem an appropriate amount of time. When she’s not hanging out with her kids, Suzanne loves a good cup of coffee, conversation with friends, musical theater and a trip to the beautiful California coast. Clearly, death is not God’s original plan. 14, 17). Randall Curtis serves as the Rhode Island Regional Coordinator for the Baptist Convention of New England. Dealing with death can be difficult. Lament is but a pit-stop on the way. “What we have once enjoyed we can never lose… Clearly, death is not God’s original plan. I feel the sorrow of my uncle’s death more than past losses. There are things that death cannot touch.” ― Jack Thorne 3. And as often happens in life, the healing never comes. As a result, Lazarus dies and is buried (vv. Despite the rich legacy Uncle Randy leaves, his death is still a horribly sad disruption — for those of us on earth. We do not grieve as those who have no hope, Paul says (1 Thessalonians 4:13-14). I couldn’t fully know the influence a long-distance uncle had in my life until he was gone. The grandparents I grew up knowing have lived long lives. Leo Buscaglia. As we mourn and try to cope with the death of a loved one, such as a father, mother, child or close friend, we can rely on God's word to get us through some of the toughest and most trying times we may have ever faced.The Bible offers comfort, because God knows and understands what we're going through in our grief, and he stands by us and is with us through it all. In every child’s favorite memory verse (v. 35), although Jesus was about to raise Lazarus from the dead, He delays the miracle a little longer to weep with great emotion. “All deaths are sudden, no matter how gradual the dying may be.” Humans are embodied... 3. All of us who have lost loved ones to illness are in that in-between time period. 38-44). My cousins, who are my age, have lost their dad. Jesus shows us it’s okay to cry, as long as in our tears we trust in Him as the resurrection and the life. Some of our loved ones have already been buried. It is this call to faith which Jesus Himself says is the reason for His delay (v. 15). Tagged: Randall Curtis, death, grief, Christian living. God’s provision is most obvious when we stop and look for it. When Jesus arrives at Bethany, Martha meets Him (v. 20). Since He was about to raise Lazarus from the dead, wouldn’t it have been easier to call her to faith after the miracle? They speak a truth about Brian and about you. You feel that keenly when you lose someone you love. I celebrated Uncle Randy’s life with my family over the weekend, and while there were tears, there was also laughter. Clearly, death is not God’s original plan. Jesus vaguely tells her that her brother will rise again, but He doesn’t tell her when (v. 23). My siblings and I would be just beginning to stir in our tent, and we would hear Randy rustling around in the campsite, getting the coffee going and singing his own version of a coffee brand jingle — “Coffee’s perking and Randy’s lurking.”. What God creates God loves, and what God loves God loves everlastingly. And although I know many lose a parent much earlier in life, it’s still an abrupt parting. She lives in California with her husband, Kevin, who is a family pastor, and her four young children: Josiah, Sadie, Amelia and Jackson. Uncle Randy is now exploring the presence of God — just ahead of the rest of us. Then He calls her to believe in Him as the resurrection and the life (vv. ~ Psalm 30:5b. 160 Powerful Quotes About Losing a Loved One and Coping 1. The key to lamenting well is to realize that we were not designed to live in lament. A popular song in the 1940s went, "I've got you under my... 2. Dealing with death can be difficult. I don’t want to waste my pain comparing it to someone else’s. Confessing Sin to Others Is Terrifying (but Healthy), 5 Questions with Caleb Kaltenbach, a Pastor Raised by Gay Parents, Four Thankfulness Lessons From the Past Four Years, Why Comparing Our Struggles Is a Losing Game. And nothing helps me stop and look like my thankfulness journal. Do you believe? ― Michael McDowell 2. Years of fruitful labor have done their work and will continue to pay off for many generations to come. You feel that keenly when you lose someone you love. We are saddened and disappointed that our loved one was not healed, and yet Jesus holds out the hope of a future resurrection – a hope proved certain by the dramatic raising of Lazarus (vv. All of us who have lost loved ones to illness are in that in-between time period. Let them echo through this day and carry you into the next. My mind turns to the story of the raising of Lazarus in John 11 when Jesus Himself lost someone He loved (John 11:3, 5), and I ponder three questions: At the beginning of the story (v. 3), Jesus is told that his friend Lazarus is sick, but Jesus delays two days before heading to Bethany (v. 5). Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. 25-26). Others can feel anger, resentment, fear and lack of confidence, whilst others find a quiet peace. He was a teacher in the same community for many years, and his impact was widely felt. Reflections on the Death of a Loved One 1. Through the tributes and testimonies, it was clear that my uncle lived the Gospel. 38-44). Why is the death of a loved one so painful an experience? Known as Dr. Love, Buscaglia is a motivational speaker known for learning to love, … But my uncle’s death hits closer to home. The loss of a loved one is one of the most stressful and traumatic experiences we can have as human beings. We must never think that God treats the death of one of His own casually. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. The family requests that Jesus heal their brother (v. 3) just as many families pray for those they love. I am hard pressed between the two. 21,32,37). "...weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning." In the midst of our sorrow, we have reason for faith. This prompts Mary, Martha and the crowd to say something like, “If only You had been here Lazarus would not have died” (vv. My uncle, who was the ultimate joker, would have loved that. Even memorial celebrations for others can trigger the pain of your own loss. They are the thread that runs through everything I will say to you. Jesus balanced grief and faith. written by reflectionsintheword. reflections which people have been searching for. And I felt that deeply as we celebrated my uncle’s life. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. As I’ve sought to live in thankfulness the past four years, I’ve noticed a deep joy and peace take root in my heart. Sign up now to stay informed about how God is working in New England. Certain reminders of your loved one might be inevitable, such as a visit to the loved one's grave, the anniversary of the person's death, holidays, birthdays or new events you know he or she would have enjoyed. Nearly 1,000 people attended his funeral. We were designed for joy. Perhaps part of this is that I have been fortunate to enjoy extended time with many of my relatives. On the other hand, I find it strangely comforting that Jesus felt it appropriate to grieve at the grave of someone destined for resurrection. We are in the time of Jesus’ delayed coming. Today it seems fitting that he was always the first one out of the tent on those family campouts. She graduated from Multnomah University with a degree in journalism and biblical theology.

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